A good mood in the team can’t be overvalued. It’s easier to approach others for help or just relax between tasks with some jokes. But it’s hard to start if you don’t know others well enough. This might happen when a team has just formed or a new joiner feels alienated. One way to find similarities between people is to cultivate Personal Manuals. These are short descriptions of who you are, what you like (or don’t), and your preferred ways of working. They also reveal things you usually don’t ask about during daily meetings, like being a Sci-Fi fan or cheering for the same football team.

How to do it?

You need a template that people can copy, paste, and fill out on their own. Save some time by sending it a few days before the meeting and asking everyone to arrive with it already filled in. There should still be some time to make updates and corrections during the meeting. It’s fine if people copy some topics from each other—that’s exactly what we’re looking for: similarities between strangers.

When people are ready (and just that one person who arrived unprepared is still filling it out), you can start by encouraging everyone to present their manuals. If you have extroverts, they might want to go first—let them. Otherwise, be ready to lead the way as the team leader. It’s fine if people joke, ask questions, or interrupt. Just reserve enough time for that, and bring some snacks if the meeting might take longer.

It might not be obvious after the first or even the second person, but at some point you’ll start discovering connections, like:

  • 70% of people like the same music,
  • they enjoy Sci-Fi movies,
  • they do pole dancing or run ultra-marathons.

After such sessions, the team discovers specialists in areas not directly related to work, but which help build stronger bonds and relationships. It’s just easier to work or align with people who think like you, do similar things, and this exercise helps make that happen.

Personal Manual Template

Below is a refined template for a “Personal Manual.” Feel free to adapt or extend it. Providing fun or unusual examples can encourage people to be creative and authentic. The goal is to make this exercise enjoyable and insightful. See the sources at the bottom for more ideas1234.

USER GUIDE FOR: John Doe

Roles: Team Lead / DevOps Engineer / Hacker / Father / …

MY MISSION

What I want to achieve, my long-term goal:

Example: To build products that make people’s lives easier and to grow as a leader.

HOW TO BEST COMMUNICATE WITH ME

  • Face to face
  • Slack
  • Email (expect a few days’ delay in response)
  • Video call

MY WORK STYLE

  • I work best with music:
    • House
    • EDM
    • Nu-metal
    • Classical
    • (I have no tolerance for hip-hop)
  • I enjoy meeting and talking with people—in person
  • I like jokes and a relaxed atmosphere
  • I’m a team player / I’m a lone wolf
  • I like to discuss problems and solutions / I prefer to test solutions hands-on
  • I like to learn new things / I prefer to work with what I know
  • I ask a lot of questions to understand things / I prefer clear requirements
  • I believe coffee is a food group
  • I sometimes talk to my rubber duck (and it answers)
  • My productivity increases by 200% if there are snacks nearby

WHAT I RESPECT

  • People who stand by their values, even under pressure
  • Lifelong learners who share their knowledge generously
  • Creative thinkers who aren’t afraid to challenge the status quo
  • Teammates who can be counted on, especially when things get tough
  • People who can solve a Rubik’s cube in under a minute
  • Anyone who brings snacks to meetings
  • Those who can admit when they’re wrong (and laugh about it)
  • Colleagues who make work fun, not just productive

WHAT I DON’T HAVE PATIENCE FOR

  • Meetings without clear goals
  • Tasks that don’t move us closer to a solution
  • Wasting time on unnecessary details
  • People who steal my favorite pen
  • When someone says “let’s circle back” for the fifth time

PERSONAL INTERESTS

  • Craft beer tasting
  • Listening to music (all genres except hip-hop)
  • Watching or playing sports
  • Spending time with family and friends
  • Traveling / TV series / Board games

MOVIES THAT INSPIRED ME

  • What’s the best movie ever, you would recommend?
  • What movies had the biggest impact on you? (Limit to 3)

⚠️ WARNING – WHAT PEOPLE OFTEN MISUNDERSTAND ABOUT ME

Example: I may seem quiet, but I’m just thinking deeply. I’m not angry, just focused.

  1. https://friday.app/p/personal-user-manual-for-work external link  ↩︎

  2. https://www.atlassian.com/team-playbook/plays/my-user-manual external link  ↩︎

  3. https://futureforum.com/2022/07/15/personal-user-manual/ external link  ↩︎

  4. https://www.flexos.work/learn/the-best-personal-user-manual-for-work-guide-template external link  ↩︎